Rule #62: Don't take yourself too damn seriously!
Have a witty caption? Send it to specialprojects@aagrapevine.org 1. "Yes, Igor, when you've been drinking, you ARE a monster."Brent G., Gut Level Group, Springville, CA 2. "I don't think you're that unique, Frank. A lot of people get ugly when they drink."Anonymous 3. "Instead of getting Frank in a stein of beers, how about getting Frank to an AA meeting?"Larry 4. "So, you feel like you're the only one, right?"Anonymous 5. "Well Frank, when they are talking about their 'creator,' they mean something a little bit different...."Michael R. 6. "Don't worry Frank, you don't have to bend your knees to take the first step. I couldn't either."S.O.O.C. 7. "The bad news is, the doctor gave you an alcoholic brain; the good news is, it wasn't hardly ever used."Greg M., Decatur, IL 8. "The rhumba on that police car was ill-advised."Mike M.,Watertown, NY 9. "A screw loose? It's the key to openmindedness!"Fabian S., Bangalore, India ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Rule #62: Past cartoons and submissions
1. "All he keeps saying is, 'I should have called my sponsor.'"Ron J., Yorktown, PA 2. "Is there any room in the jar for another pickle?"Bill C., Phoenix, AZ 3. "Well, at least he came along 'policefully.'"Bill F., Port Whitby Group, ON 4. Winner:"I caught this guy going the wrong way down the 'Road of Happy Destiny.'"Grant H., Serenity Squad Young People's Group, Lexington, KY 5. "He thought 'One Day at a Time' didn't include nights!"Anonymous 6. "I found him stuck on the first step."Dan P. 7. "I picked him up at the hospital. He was drunk and dissed orderlies."Anonymous 8. Every weekend, chug-a-lug. He chugs, I lug."Mike M., Watertown, NY
1. "Is this what they call a low bottom drunk? S.R.B. 2. "So, you think we should head to the meeting now?"Scott W., Westerly, RI 3. "Told you I could drink us both under the table!"Bruce G., Houston, TX 4. "Hey Fred, I have this feeling that alcoholism is always hanging over my head!"Alan M., NY 5. "Shhh, I don't think she will ever catch us down here."Randy G., Prosser, WA 6. Winner:"Think we should order one more before last call?"M.D., Del Valle, TX 7. "We gotta get outta here, they open back up soon!"Scott, RI
1. "Ignore th' bumss, sshhweetie. I thhhink you're beauti ... beat ... pretty."Brent G., Gut Level Group, Springville, CA 2. "I'll bet you were the prettiest girl in detox."Alexander W., Fort Lauderdale, FL 3. "Hi darlin' my name's Cody Pendant and I think we have lotsh in common."Sandy, Wyong, Australia 4. "Those two bartenders over there ... one's Baffling, the other's Powerful; Cunning is on a break."Dan B., Out To Lunch Group, Madison, WI 5. "Can I have my garnish back please?"Bob 6. Winner:"Those guys don't know how special we are."Anonymous 7. "I've got an idea! Let's drive over to my place and get wasted."Anonymous 8. "The cartoonist might have drawn us better if he'd gone to that meeting!"Bruce W. 9. "Finally, someone who enjoys drinking as much as I do! Let's get married!"Bruce G., Houston, TX
1. "Think I'll head back to Omaha, where AA is serious but the fun never stops!"Anonymous 2. Winner:"As his doctor tells him he must stop drinking, Fred has a flashback to an earlier experience.Woody R., Stockton, CA 3. "Wow! I guess they weren't kidding when they said, 'It's not funny anymore."Anonymous 4. "Is it just me, or is my mind playing tricks again?"Anonymous 5. "I thought for sure this was my address."Victor G., Gordon, NE 6. "Standing in front of the next-to-last house on the block, Fred ponders last night's debacle." Loren B., Bozeman, MT
1. "I know we only need two people for a meeting, but I've been sober a year! I'm ready to meet some other recovering alcoholics.Kathleen, West Hartford, CT 2. "Sober all of thirty years and I'm still getting the lectures."Robbyn F., Casper, WY 3. "Honey, I just don't think I can control your drinking any longer!"Bruce G., Houston, TX 4. "So the group called you a bleeding deacon. Would you like me to take you to the hospital or would a bandaid suffice? Woody R., Stockton, CA 5. "You don't have to say your name. I know who you are."Georgia F., Arcaadia, LA 6. Winner:"Honey, you wouldn't happen to know anything about the bottle in the fireplace flue, would you?"Gary L., Chandler, AZ 7. "Say, Mr. Restless, Irritable and Discontented; doesn't your home group meet tonight?Anonymous 8. "And to think I gave up a cardboard box for this!"Anonymous 9. "I thought she was supposed to confine her sharing to five minutes or less!"Jimmy D., Deep River, CT 10. "I'm telling you, as the vote is deadlocked, the Service Manual says we have to go to the hat."James, New Zealand
1. "Good heavens, it's your father!"Anonymous 2. "I told him that he better change his attitude, not his altitude!"David B., Grace Group, Edmonton, Canada 3. "I think Santa had one too many eggnogs."Steve F., Rockland, MA 4. Winner:"Happy, joyous, and stuck up a tree!"Tom 5. "That's why Mummy goes to all of those meetings, darling."James, New Zealand 6. "He always gets lit up about the same time that the tree does!"Howard M.
1. "You're just a barrel of barfs, aren't you?"Sandy H., Wyong, Australia 2. "My husband went out looking for you ...."Alan M., Long Island, NY 3. "A newcomer to AA, Betty forgot to cancel her daily microbrew delivery."Terry D., West Springfield, MA 4. "What? You found him? And he wants a refill?"Brian, Wagga Wagga, Australia 5. "Honey, did you call animal rescue again?Cathy B., Cumming, GA 6. "Ahh, now I know why they call you man's best friend.Lorna 7. "I think it's time you joined "Alcohodogolicks Anonymous."Bill F., Port Whitby Group, Ontario 8. Winner:"I know they say 'rebellion dogs our every step,' but I didn't know they meant my front step!David 9. "I'm sorry, the Barlycorns live next door."Kevin L., Holyoke Noontime 10. "You're just in time for the Ala-Dog Meeting."Chuck M., Freehold, NJ 11. "So you went drinking and lost your key to the dog house againAnnie, Canal Winchester, OH?" 12. "You're a Saint, Bernard! But I'm not drinking anymore!"Tim M., Bradenton, FL 13. "Who called for 'Hair-of-the-Dog' delivery?"Tim K., Sugar Grove, OH 14. "I see booze has you over a barrel again."Anonymous, Bridgeport, CT |
Joke of the MonthFrom July Grapevine: OLDIE BUT GOODIE: I once heard of a songwriter who tried to compose a drinking song. But she could never get past the first three bars. V.R.M., Brooklyn, NY Want more? Try the Digital Archive Grab Bag! Send your jokes to the Humor Editor, PO Box 1980, 475 Riverside Drive, NewYork, NY 10115, or e-mail gveditorial@aagrapevine.org About Rule #62Remember the hot shot from the Tradition Four essay in "The Twelve and Twelve"? Humbled when his pet project collapses under a long list of rules, he has a good laugh at himself and adds the kicker, Rule #62 In that spirit, we invite you to join the fun and think of a caption for the cartoon! Give it a try--let your imagination fly. On a weekly basis, we will post some of the submissions online so you can see some of the other wonderfully wacky one-liners your fellow onliners have come up with. Don't be shy. Send your captions to: specialprojects@aagrapevine.orgThis page was last updated June 26, 2008 |
